And he goes missing

It's good to wake up in the breaks of thoughts
The days feels lengthy as if you are breathing from past 48 hours non stop
Sensing every bit of it
In the lungs and out of heart

Trying to feel his presence
Unlocking the phone was natural
And admist all the ting tong
I find my smile shying back
It wasn't him this time
Instead that one friend had found his space back in to the head yesterday night
I had revisited all our gossips within a fraction of seconds
And I missed him often
He had the habit of asking me for chai
Which meant we would be talking
Talking about our lost smiles
Talking about that one person we miss every morning
The good thing to narrate to him about him
Was I had never found a judgment for me in his eyes
May be they never mattered him
May be he just listened to me for that moment
But it felt good to say a thousand words, a thousand times and still see him smiling
Sometimes over my stupidity
Sometimes over my stories  some in the air and rest in the eyes, floating!

The last time I remember with him was
He losing himself in that room
Smelling alcohol and vodka
Adoring the girl once found and now lost
And then turning to the corner
I was lying on the sofa
Trying to sip the alcohol in the air 
For I too was trying to get over a name
With the lemon slices in my tongue and not the hands
"You are fine na?" Was all he had asked
And I had nodded with a smile

How broken piece worry for bits of pieces lying down
Unable to bring back the lost
And breathe with stitched nerves